What do you do in such dyer situations?
You befriend some Ozzi guys, one of whom was wearing coloured contact lenses (cringe) aka “Blue-eyed Rapist” and his friend aka “Fatty” for self explanatory reasons of being fat...
They were ugly, unintelligent and Blue-eyed rapist was partially deaf but the possibilities of free drinks meant we stayed. Due to the unexpected bad weather we dragged the pre-drinking group we had collected into the sauna. We shared a dorm with two 18 year old Brits – easily swayed thanks to them wearing retainers, being young and privately educated. After a few drinks and shouting one syllable words into Blue-eyed Rapist ears we were graced with his favourite chat up line...
“If you get raped, you jus’ gotta ge’ over it”
Silence fell – “erm excuse me?” He soon received the Annie and K treatment and proceeded to get slapped. By this point one of the 18 year olds was battered and after a few words of encouragement she too joined in.
K fell for Blue-eyed Rapist’s ‘charm’ and had a cheeky snogg – Fatty made head ways for Annie but his chat just wasn’t quite cutting it. The next hour was spent trying to get the wasted 18 year old in the club and fighting with Fatty because he expected some neck action...
After empting their wallets we made a hasty escape from Fatty and Blue-eyed Rapist... During our stumble home we found ourselves demanding drugs from an illiterate obese bouncer, epic fail. We begged for friendship with a police man, he was unimpressed. We then proceeded to pretend to sell meth in our YHA hostel....oh dear. With an overall unenthusiastic reaction we went to bed.
Sydney cock? Well neither of us were willing to get raped or squashed to find out...
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